(via whole-living)
(via whole-living)
(Source: calendarnotes, via whole-living)
At a certain point, eating disorders cease to be ‘about’ any one thing. It stops being about your family, or your culture. Very simply, it becomes an addiction not only emotionally but also chemically. And it becomes a crusade. If you are honest with yourself, you stop believing that anyone could ‘make’ you do such a thing — who, your parents? They want you to starve to death? Not likely. Your environment? It couldn’t care less.You are also doing it for yourself. It is a shortcut to something many women without an eating disorder have gotten: respect and power. It is a visual temper tantrum. You are making an ineffective statement about this and that, a grotesque, self-defeating mockery of cultural standards of beauty, societal misogyny. It is a blow to your parents, at whom you are pissed.
And it is so very seductive. It is so reassuring, so all-consuming, so entertaining.
At first.
And it is so very seductive. It is so reassuring, so all-consuming, so entertaining.
At first.
We turn skeletons into goddesses and look to them as if they might teach us how not to need.
– Marya Hornbacher, Wasted (via coma-indigo)
There is, in fact, an incredible freedom in having nothing left to lose.
– Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia (via je-suis-plus)
(Source: die-verlassene-eine)
It is not a sudden leap from sick to well. It is a slow, strange meander from sick to mostly well. The misconception that eating disorders are a medical disease in the traditional sense is not helpful here. There is no ‘cure’. A pill will not fix it, though it may help. Ditto therapy, ditto food, ditto endless support from family and friends. You fix it yourself. It is the hardest thing that I have ever done, and I found myself stronger for doing it. Much stronger.
(via coffee-and-control)
I breathe in slowly. Food is life. I exhale, take another breath. Food is life. And that’s the problem. When you’re alive, people can hurt you. It’s easier to crawl into a bone cage or a snowdrift of confusion. It’s easier to lock everybody out.
But it’s a lie.
But it’s a lie.
– Wintergirls (via enamoredwithroses)
(Source: fearlessknightsandfairytales, via coffee-and-control)